The Most Clueless Gringo in Costa Rica: A Satirical Take on Expat Life

If part of your online day includes mindless scrolling through reels, you’ve probably seen the Dos Equis beer parody commercials.

The original ads featured the supposed “Most Interesting Man in the World” doing all kinds of larger-than-life activities while a voiceover delivered lines like: His only regret is not knowing what regret feels like. Each spot ended with him seated in a plush setting, looking impeccable, and signing off with the tagline: I don’t always drink beer, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis.

The spoofs now floating around the internet parody different groups and stereotypes — The Most German Man in the World, The Most Jewish Man, The Most Woke Man, and so on.

I’ve come up with my own version, with a local twist: “The Most Clueless Gringo in Costa Rica.”

(Note: While many of these could apply to both men and women, I’m using “he” here just for simplicity.)

He wears running shorts in downtown San José — even when he’s not running.
He speaks to Ticos in English, and when they don’t understand, he just switches to louder English.
He calls Costa Rican currency “Monopoly money.”
He complains about the prices as he buys a $3 can of Campbell’s Pork and Beans, while ignoring local options at half the cost.
He thinks “Going Native” means bathing once a week in his swimming pool.
He throws toilet paper into the toilet instead of the waste bin in public restrooms, because the sign telling him not to is only in Spanish — which he can’t read.
He sneaks behind tour groups in national parks so he can listen to the guide without actually paying.
He visits Costa Rica in October, then complains there’s too much rain and not enough sun.
Until he got here, he thought Costa Rica was an island.
He believes every young Tica who smiles politely at him is secretly attracted to him.
His idea of practicing Spanish is saying, “Buenos días, amor,” to the empleada who comes to clean his house.
He brags — and complains — about how much he paid for his 80-inch flat screen TV.
He lives in a gated community and only watches the same English-language TV shows he did back home.
He says: “I don’t always drink, but when I do, I like to mention that it just isn’t as good as what I drink back home.”