No menu items!

COSTA RICA'S LEADING ENGLISH LANGUAGE NEWSPAPER

HomeTopicsArts and CultureSay What? We Heard It on the News from Costa Rica

Say What? We Heard It on the News from Costa Rica

Sometimes the news on TV or radio is so perplexing it leaves us wondering if we heard it right. Even more surprising is that the reporters deliver such news with straight faces.

Here are some examples: A man from Alajuela, northwest of San José, had an enormous marijuana plant growing in his yard. He explained to the police that he didn’t know it was marijuana and he was saving it for a Christmas tree. (Just wait till they burn the Yule log – holy smoke!)

A woman was electrocuted when she plugged in the washer and they took the husband to the hospital in shock. (Is that right?)

A man went to a phone booth to make a call at two in the morning wearing only his underpants, and he was held up. (What on earth did he have to steal?)

Because here they use decimal points instead of commas to denote thousands, this item has a potentially huge margin of error. An economic report stated that the annual per-capita income in Estonia is $14 million. (Adios, Costa Rica. Hello, Estonia!)

The skeleton of a mermaid turned out to be a hoax. (No fooling.)

An Alajuela man accused his wife of spousal abuse for farting at him. The judge threw out the case, saying that it is not a crime to fart. (Prison conditions are bad enough without adding farters.)

The nude body of a man in an advanced state of putrefaction was discovered in a dam in Santa Ana, southwest of the capital, but remained unidentified because there were no reports of missing persons matching the description. (If you knew anyone like that, would you claim him?)

A headline in the sensational daily Diario Extra read “Woman Strangled by Brassiere.” (Why didn’t she get a larger size?)

Informe Once” news program reported that someone in the northwestern province of Guanacaste found a mushroom in the shape of the Virgin. (No comment.)

In the daily La Nación’s Sunday magazine Proa, an article on the Minute Men, U.S. vigilantes who dress in military fatigues, carry rifles and station themselves along the Mexican border to stop illegal immigrants from crossing over, quoted one of the men as saying, “What did Mexico ever give us?” (Tacos, burritos, tortillas, Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, Nevada, California…)

A commercial for a casa de empeño (pawn shop) claimed it had parking for 40 cars. (What does that say for the state of the economy?) Thieves stole 1,000 full sheets of El Gordo, the Christmas lottery, but the door opened on the getaway truck and they all fell out. (Next time, take a minute to buckle your seat belt.) Eight hundred sheets were recovered, but 200 were still missing. It seems a taxi driver found them but didn’t know what they were. He never buys lottery tickets because gambling is a vice. (You bet.)

In Spanish, a jack is called a gata, the same word as a female feline. A want ad for a hydraulic jack came out in the pets column. (The Capital Times of Madison,Wisconsin, once ran an ad in the boating section for a wench with good teeth.)

Channel 42 is Diario Extra’s TV station, and the evening news always starts out with sucesos: crime, shootings, traffic accidents and drownings. One night, the big news was that nothing bad had happened that day and there were no sucesos.

Bewildering news happens. This strange statement was in a U.S. magazine: “The black rhinoceros is distinguished from the white rhinoceros by the size of its snout.” (In case you’re color blind.) And, alas, even The Nica Times can confound.

In the Oct. 20 issue, just before Halloween, there was a report of a new “boo store” in Managua. (Boo who?)

Trending Now

Nicaraguan Exiles Demand Protection After Costa Rica Assassination

More than 70 exiled Nicaraguans demanded international protection on Friday following the shooting death in Costa Rica of retired army officer Roberto Samcam, a...

U.S. Embassy in Costa Rica Mandates Public Social Media for Student Visas

The U.S. Embassy in Costa Rica announced a new rule for anyone applying for F, M, or J nonimmigrant visas, which cover academic students,...

Climate Change in Costa Rica Devastates Coffee Farms in Los Santos

In Costa Rica’s Los Santos region, famous for producing nearly half the country’s coffee, farmers are reeling from heavy losses driven by wild weather....

U.S. – Guatemala Security Pact Targets Crime and Helps Returning Migrants

U.S. Secretary of Homeland Security Kristi Noem signed a border security cooperation agreement with Guatemala on Thursday, which includes the use of drones and...

Internet Cut in Panama Near Costa Rica Border Amid Bocas del Toro Unrest

Panamanian authorities suspended internet and mobile phone services on Saturday in the Caribbean province of Bocas del Toro, following President José Raúl Mulino’s declaration...

Costa Rica and U.S. Strengthen Border Scans and Biometric Cooperation

U.S. Secretary of Homeland Security Kristi Noem met Wednesday with Honduran President Xiomara Castro to discuss security and migration, following her offer in Costa...
spot_img
Costa Rica Tours
Costa Rica Coffee Maker Chorreador
Costa Rica Coffee Maker Chorreador
Costa Rica Travel Insurance
Costa Rica Rocking Chait
Costa Rica Travel

Latest News from Costa Rica